Dan Brown's Impending Novel about the RCA
Monday, September 21, 2009 at 12:36PM Ok... clearly this is fiction.. clearly this is entirely off topic... I suppose someone will even manage to find it offensive, but at least it's a post on these boards that isn't about homosexuality.Oh yea, and for the record, none of the characters are intended to represent real-life individuals!
I just finished Dan Brown's latest novel, it isn't my favorite. On the other hand, one of the forums I follow somewhere else is discussing it and someone posted Slate.com's "Interactive Dan Brown Plot Generator." Fun. Why not? I figured... a little bit of searching and replacing and maybe even Dan Brown could include the RCA in his next tome....
A long-forgotten code secretly protected in the depths of Grand Rapids' and New York's most famous churches.
A nefarious cult determined to protect it.
A frantic race to uncover the RCA's darkest secret.
The Serpentine Crypt
When renowned Harvard symbologist Robert Langdon is summoned to the RCA offices to analyze a mysterious rune—imprinted on a gold ring lying next to the disemboweled corpse of an unidentified staff member—he discovers evidence of the unthinkable: the resurgence of the ancient cult of the Diablofori, a secret branch of the Reformed Church that has surfaced from the shadows to carry out its legendary vendetta against its mortal enemy, the Vatican.
Langdon's worst fears are confirmed when a messenger from the Diablofori appears at the Canadian Supreme Court to deliver a macabre ultimatum: Deposit $1 billion in the Reformed Church's off-shore bank accounts or the exclusive clothier of the Swiss Guards will be bankrupted. As the city braces for disaster, Langdon joins forces with the posteriorally-gifted and charming daughter of the murdered staff member in a desperate bid to crack the code that will reveal the cult's secret plan.
Embarking on a frantic hunt, Langdon and his companion follow a 200-year-old trail through Grand Rapid's and New York's most sacred churches and venerable monuments, pursued by a mustachioed assassin the cult has sent to thwart them. What they discover threatens to expose a conspiracy that goes all the way back to John Calvin and the very founding of the Reformed Church.
Reader Comments (7)
Tim,
You realize they will come after you for sharing their secrets right....
There is nothing I can do to protect you......
Justin
The darkness and deceit of their betrayal is, even as we speak, overcoming my house...
Oh... yeah... I live in SW Michigan.. that's probably just fog... with no doom or unnatural gloom involved, huh :-)
Grace and Peace,
`tim
I am assuming that you used the Dan Brown Novel generator found at Slate.com to create this?
Duh, maybe I should have reread the post that clearly stated such. Never mind...
Clever! If there are mysterious funds to be hidden could we bring them down here to the middle of Indiana, because we are very far from Gr. Rapids and New York in more ways than mileage. We could certainly protect the funds and the valuables and make good use of them.
Mary of Lafayette
Ha! Ha! Quite possibly the funniest thing I've seen all day.
Although, as a GSC staff member, I can only hope that I'm not the corpse of the unidentified staff member.
I think that this is a great plot. Our church is in Herkimer, NY and will be 300 years old in 13 or 14 years. Maybe we can be featured in the book so we can use it to celebrate our tricentennial. We even have a graveyard around the church. When they put the new parking lot and dug out the new cellar for the fellowship hall, they unearthed bodies. Maybe the scene could be reconstructed and one of the bodies could be clutching one of the secrets! It would be really funny to do a spoof and do this. Are there any drama/theatrical majors out there?!